Julia and I haven't spoken much. She's always blabbing on about Emily. No seriously. She's always like "Emily did this..." Or "Emily said this..." And it's annoying. Not only that but I also haven't been spending time with her. My anxiety isn't helping with any of this either. It's making it all so much worse. When my anxiety gets that bad, so does my depression. Julia hasn't been riding the bus so I get to sit there and listen to depressing music just like last year.
Last night, I went ice skating with my sister (Makenna) and her friend Makenzie. It was about 7 at night and completely dark out so I wasn't feeling very safe. To make things worse, they decided they wanted to go and drag a guy to the ice rink. He already said he didn't want to go and that he just got home from hockey practice but they still tried to get him to come. We walked through the dark neighborhood alone and no one was out there. I ended up having a minor panic attack because I thought we were going to get kidnapped or something. So I called my mother and asked her to come pick us up but didn't tell them that I did that. She showed up a few minutes later and I was so relieved and felt so much better. We went back to the ice rink so they could get their skates and they ended up skating even more whole Mom and me talked in the car. I cried a little bit and we joked around before heading back home.
Speaking of Mom, she bought me diet pills a few days ago. I asked her to buy them though, so it wasn't an insult. So far I've been doing good with them and I'm hoping they'll help. They need to. If I don't lose 20 pounds by summer I'm going to have a terrible summer and school year. So let's hope they work out well!
Lizzy dyed her hair red. Like a bright red. It doesn't look good at all and it probably damaged her hair so badly. She didn't bleach it before she dyed it so she probably had to dye it over and over again. On Friday, she wore a white shirt and Rachel King said that she looked like a tampon. Rachel is a really nice person so I don't actually think she said it, but it is hilarious. Lizzy actually does look like a bloody tampon with her hair like that and I hope it fades soon.
Love always,
Maddy Iverson
